People involved in open relationships explain how it works for them

“I have a low sex drive and my wife does not. I am a lesbian and my wife is not, she is bisexual. She remains attracted to men, despite being married to me.

“With those two things in mind, we developed a method (with strict boundaries and rules) for her to explore her interest in others. It’s usually a friends with benefits situation, but there has been a one night stand (which violated several rules and we had a heavy argument about it).

“Our rules are as follows:

:: No surprises. I want to know when you realise you’re attracted to someone and to know in advance when you plan to or want to pursue something.

:: No dating. I don’t want my wife having another relationship, I just want her physical needs met where I cannot meet them.

:: No unprotected sex, unless we’re very familiar with that person. And even then, birth control is required on her end.

“That’s pretty much it. I want to know when it’s happening, who it’s happening with, and that she’s safe. There are some other nuances that aren’t exactly ‘rules’, but that I prefer. I would rather it not happen in my house so that I don’t have to look at it or go somewhere else.”

– SheaRVA



“I am not in the relationship, but I am FWB (friends with benefits) with a guy in an open relationship. I have known about it from the beginning and don’t have any issues with it. I appreciate that everything is on the up and up. There are no lies and no disappointment. They have each other’s hearts, and that won’t change, but they both enjoy sex with others so it benefits them to continue that arrangement.

“Their rules are that there are no overnights, they must tell the other person where they’re going, and they must use protection.

“I don’t know how I’d feel if I were the girlfriend and not just the side piece. My heart is not invested so it’s easy for me to have him over and send him home after. But for them, it removes all of the deceit so they’re not cheating on each other. They’re still happy and get to have the sexual fulfilment they want. I appreciate them for that.”

– SortedN2Slytherin


“Not exactly fully open, but I’m in a cuckold setup with my wife. We’ve been together for over eight years, married for four. I gave her permission, and encouragement even, to sleep with others. Between when we started dating and we got married she was with two other guys. Since marriage she’s been with five more. Recently she found a Dom and she is his sub. I’ve never been able to play the role of a Dom well, so I’m happy she’s able to explore that kink with someone else.

“It’s going great. We’ve never been closer and are having a lot of fun together. We have more sex together when she is also sleeping with others. 

“If you seek an open marriage because you’re having issues, you’re going to have a bad time. If you open it up with trust, respect, clear communication, and honesty, you should be okay. It’s not for everyone.

“We have a few rules, such as to practice safe sex (birth control, STD tests), and to keep it on the down-low. No co-workers or friends.”

– hopefulcuck


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